Today is Memorial Day. Three years ago, Jacob and I started a new family tradition. It was his first Memorial Day in the United States and he was a new American. I took him in his stroller and we walked about 20 minutes to the local parade. We bought breakfast at McDonald's near the parade route and ate it while we sat in the grass waiting for the parade. It was a great time and we have repeated it every year since then. It is why I try hard to get this holiday off work.
Memorial Day has taken on new meaning since I took my first international trip to Peru and even more after I became a mom. My first trip to Peru, I realized how blessed we are in this country. It is the land of opportunity. Yes, it is harder to succeed if you grow up in certain areas or families but I have seen enough people come from very difficult childhoods to be successful adults. Whether it was my friend whose aunt and uncle raised him in a low-income neighborhood and left him mostly unsupervised, my friend who was adopted from foster care at age 13, a fellow student who was severly abused as a child or any of the countless other people I have met, they all show it is possible to make your dreams come true here. It is a gift that many other people around the world will never experience.
I always get slightly emotional when the soldiers and flags go by during the parade. I remember all the blessings I have. I think about my children and how in so many other countries we would not be allowed to exist. Single parenthood is never tolerated and sometimes outlawed. In this country, I do run into resistance occassionally. People who think my children would be better off in other families. People who as why I "just don't get married." People who assume I am unethical and immoral because my children and I don't "match."
Yet mostly we receive support and love. Most people get excited when they ask about M's adoption. We have become somewhat of role models for other people looking to adopt children. A month doesn't go by that someone doesn't approach me looking for answers about foster care adoption or international adoption. Many people ask if I am done having children. When I tell them I want one more someday, they get excited and begin telling me where they think my next child should come from. At this time, I don't know when that child will come or from where. I am still waiting for God to tell me.
This Memorial Day I want to say thank you. Thank you to the civilian emergency responders who protect me and my family on the homefront. Thank you to the military members who protect us overseas and protect our borders. America is not perfect but it has given me more blessings than I could ever imagine. I love this country and am glad we live here.
Monday, May 31, 2010
Pool Pictures
Jacob and M got a new pool last week. They have been begging to swim in it every day since then. Here are some pictures from the first time.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
10 Things You May Not Know About Us
Here are 10 things you may not know about our family (indluded extended family):
1) Our family represents four different racial ethnicities.
2) There will soon be four family members who were adopted (one international, two foster care and one domestic).
3) Of our friends we speak to or see often, there is only one family that is a married couple with a biological child. Others have children through adoption, are single parents or are not married to their children's parents.
4) Jacob wants to be a doctor or firefighter when he grows up. M wants to be a police officer or a firefighter with Jacob.
5) Whenever someone says Jacob is lucky to be my son, I always tell them I am the lucky one because I was allowed to be his mom. Jacob interrupts and says, "No. I'm lucky your my mom." Maybe we are both blessed to have found each other.
6) Jacob's estimated birthday is 2 days after my Grandmother's. She is 86 years older than him.
7) M came to me exactly 1 day short of 1 year after Jacob's adoption was re-finalized. M came on August 21, 2008. Jacob's adoption was finalized in the US on August 22, 2007.
8) Jacob's first name has the same meaning as his Ethiopian name (Mitiku). They both mean replacement or he replaced him.
9) Jacob was also the name of my great-uncle. M's middle name is my father's name.
10) Jacob and M are 20 months apart in age. My brother and I are 20 months apart in age.
1) Our family represents four different racial ethnicities.
2) There will soon be four family members who were adopted (one international, two foster care and one domestic).
3) Of our friends we speak to or see often, there is only one family that is a married couple with a biological child. Others have children through adoption, are single parents or are not married to their children's parents.
4) Jacob wants to be a doctor or firefighter when he grows up. M wants to be a police officer or a firefighter with Jacob.
5) Whenever someone says Jacob is lucky to be my son, I always tell them I am the lucky one because I was allowed to be his mom. Jacob interrupts and says, "No. I'm lucky your my mom." Maybe we are both blessed to have found each other.
6) Jacob's estimated birthday is 2 days after my Grandmother's. She is 86 years older than him.
7) M came to me exactly 1 day short of 1 year after Jacob's adoption was re-finalized. M came on August 21, 2008. Jacob's adoption was finalized in the US on August 22, 2007.
8) Jacob's first name has the same meaning as his Ethiopian name (Mitiku). They both mean replacement or he replaced him.
9) Jacob was also the name of my great-uncle. M's middle name is my father's name.
10) Jacob and M are 20 months apart in age. My brother and I are 20 months apart in age.
Summer Is Here
Jacob excitedly told me that this weekend marks the beginning of Summer. And it does. We got a kiddie pool (pictures to come) last Wed. The boys have spent as much time as I would allow Wed evening and last night in it. They love to fill it up as high as I will allow and don't seem to care how cold the water is. I am pretty sure we got our money's worth out of that pool in just the past three days and they have a long way to go this summer.
I am forced to work this weekend and my weekend sitter is out of town. That leaves my parents to watch the kids. They decided to go to a state park for the day today and the kids are really excited about it. M told me it is a "drowning lake" but he will swim with Grandpa so he doesn't drown. Jacob told me as long as he stays in close to shore he won't drown and that he will be careful. The lake they are going to is shallow for quite a ways out so he may not even have to wear a life jacket if he promises to stay near Grandpa in the water.
I am extremely jealous of course. Going to the state park is one of my favorite activities of the summer. We only went once last year but I vowed to go more this year. There are many things I plan to do since we decided we can't afford any big trips. Here are some of my "plans."
- Swimming at the state park
- Camping
- Trip to an amusement park for young kids
- Many trips to the zoo
- Trips to the local gardens
- Picnic lunches at the park
- Visit a nearby cave
- The newly renovated children's museum (when it opens)
- Grilling in the driveway while the kids ride bikes and play
- Work in my garden
- Circus World Museum
I'm not sure how many of these activities we will actually get. I am sure we will do most of them. My number one goal is just to relax and have fun with the kids. I really like the ages they are at and want to enjoy every moment I can with them.
I am forced to work this weekend and my weekend sitter is out of town. That leaves my parents to watch the kids. They decided to go to a state park for the day today and the kids are really excited about it. M told me it is a "drowning lake" but he will swim with Grandpa so he doesn't drown. Jacob told me as long as he stays in close to shore he won't drown and that he will be careful. The lake they are going to is shallow for quite a ways out so he may not even have to wear a life jacket if he promises to stay near Grandpa in the water.
I am extremely jealous of course. Going to the state park is one of my favorite activities of the summer. We only went once last year but I vowed to go more this year. There are many things I plan to do since we decided we can't afford any big trips. Here are some of my "plans."
- Swimming at the state park
- Camping
- Trip to an amusement park for young kids
- Many trips to the zoo
- Trips to the local gardens
- Picnic lunches at the park
- Visit a nearby cave
- The newly renovated children's museum (when it opens)
- Grilling in the driveway while the kids ride bikes and play
- Work in my garden
- Circus World Museum
I'm not sure how many of these activities we will actually get. I am sure we will do most of them. My number one goal is just to relax and have fun with the kids. I really like the ages they are at and want to enjoy every moment I can with them.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Our Family Doesn't Match
Jacob had a confession to make in the car today. He is tired of people asking him if M is his friend. He stated he always answers that M is his brother not his friend but he still wishes people would just see that. Jacob also confessed that he wonders if we can be a real family if we don't "match." I responded by asking him all of the ways we do match. At first he didn't understand but I pointed out that our favorite color is pink. Here are other ways Jacob and I match:
- We both like the movie Cars.
- We both prefer gummy candy and fruity candy over chocolate.
- We both love baseball.
- We both enjoy riding bikes.
- We both love M.
- We both like spaghetti.
- We both like ice cream.
- We both love to swim and would live in water if we could.
- We both enjoy watching movies.
- We love to have "Idol parties."
- We both love to go for walks when the weather is nice.
- We both enjoy going to the park and playing on the slides.
There are many other ways that Jacob and I "match." We decided that what we look like on the outside isn't important. We match on the outside in many ways. We also agreed that matching isn't what makes us a family. It's that we love each other and are committed to helping each other. That is what makes a family and we are one. No matter how strangers may view us.
I am working on a photo montage to show how the boys have grown to be brothers. I plan to post it as soon as I am allowed to finalize M's adoption. It may not be for several months but it is my current project.
- We both like the movie Cars.
- We both prefer gummy candy and fruity candy over chocolate.
- We both love baseball.
- We both enjoy riding bikes.
- We both love M.
- We both like spaghetti.
- We both like ice cream.
- We both love to swim and would live in water if we could.
- We both enjoy watching movies.
- We love to have "Idol parties."
- We both love to go for walks when the weather is nice.
- We both enjoy going to the park and playing on the slides.
There are many other ways that Jacob and I "match." We decided that what we look like on the outside isn't important. We match on the outside in many ways. We also agreed that matching isn't what makes us a family. It's that we love each other and are committed to helping each other. That is what makes a family and we are one. No matter how strangers may view us.
I am working on a photo montage to show how the boys have grown to be brothers. I plan to post it as soon as I am allowed to finalize M's adoption. It may not be for several months but it is my current project.
T-Ball Pictures
If you have never seen a preschool t-ball game, you are missing out. It is some of the cutest and funniest baseball I have ever seen. These are pictures of Jacob's first t-ball game. He is wearing a brown shirt, black hat and gray baseball pants. The shirt is an adult large but Jacob wears it with pride.
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