Wednesday, October 28, 2009

God and Hair

I really couldn't tell you how this conversation came up this morning. I was helping the boys get dressed when this conversation occurred. Here is what I remember.

Jacob states something about hair:
Me: Did you know that God knows how many hairs are on your head?'
Jacob: Yes. A lot.
Me: Yes. I don't know how many. Why do you think God knows how many hairs you have?
Jacob: Because I'm beautiful.
Me: Yes you are beautiful. God knows because he loves you so much that he knows everything about you.
Jacob: God gives people different hair.
Me: Yes he does.
Jacob: God has every kind of hair in his tummy.
Me: What do you mean?
Jacob: God grows lots of different hair on his tummy. Then he gives it to people.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Considering Another Child

Jacob has wanted a little sister for a long time. I don't blame him. I want a little girl very badly as well. There are some days where I want it less than others but the desire never leaves completely.

So what is the problem? Well to begin with, I have only been a parent for 2 1/2 years and have 2 children. The youngest has only been here for a little over a year and his process is not completed yet. It won't be for a very long time. Possibly two more years. I wish it would be quicker but I can see it won't be.

The other huge problem is that I am overwhelmed with school, work and parenting. School is giving me the chance to change careers to a job I really enjoy and am looking forward to. I don't want to slow down because I don't want to delay that dream any longer than necessary. I don't want to change careers before I get the degree because it would severely limit my options.

Work is work. It pays the bills so even though leaving would make school and life much easier, it is not an option. I would love to win the lottery but it costs money to play and I have better things to throw my money away on.

So, I will have to wait for my daughter. I will find her someday. It just won't be today or even this year. It probably won't be until I settle into a new job. Unless I can find some rich man to marry and support us in the meantime :) Just kidding.

Next month is national adoption month. It is a good reminder of how blessed I am and a chance to celebrate my children and my family. M's case will progress, school will be over in just a few weeks and I have a week off work coming soon.

New Pictures and Updates!

I finally got my wireless internet working. I had to change internet companies to do it but am excited. I haven't had internet at home for about a month. It was really making getting my school work and other business difficult. Now, I can play and work at home. Yipee! The following are pictures and updates of our recent activity.

Halloween 2009

We started our halloween festivities yesterday. Some of the parties are calling them fall harvest parties but they all involove treats and costumes so I call them all halloween parties. Last night was our first one.

I took Jacob, M and our friend P to the YMCA last night for their halloween party. The kids made treat bags at the first stop and then headed off to the gym. They loved playing the games and picking out the small toys and juice offered. After games, we headed over for face painting and then a few minutes to the dance. Jacob would have stayed until the end but M and P were exhausted. M wasn't really moving around much and I could tell he was getting close to a meltdown so we left about 30 minutes early.

I took several pictures but they all have M or P in them. Here are 2 of Jacob as a fire fighter. M was a police officer and P was a movie star.

Pumpkin Patch Photos

Here are some photos of our recent trip to the pumpkin and playtime farm. We went with our church about two weeks ago. The kids had about an hour to play on the farm before we sat down to a bonfire. I roasted hot dogs for all of us and then made some smores. I ate my smore the traditional (and best) way. They boys decided they wanted to eat them "raw" and in pieces. We all thought they were delicious. The afternoon ended with a hayride to the pumpkin field where we picked out two perfect and small pumpkins. We went back a few days later and got a medium sized pumpkin for a soup I want to try.

Jacob's Birthday Photos

Here are the photos from Jacob's much anticipated birthday party at the YMCA earlier this month. The kids started in the swimming pool. After about an hour, we moved to the party room for cake and jucie. We finished the party in the inflatable in the gym. We didn't take time to open presents at the party so we met Grandpa and Uncle Chuck at their house and opened them there.

Monday, October 19, 2009

Praying For Bad Guys

Jacob and I said our normal prayers last night. As part of the prayer, Jacob and I list people we want God to watch over and care for. When I asked Jacob if that was everyone he stated, "and bad guys." I asked him what if he wanted God to watch over the bad guys. He stated, "Yes and help them be good."

Saturday, October 17, 2009


Just some little tidbits.

-Jacob and I read a Halloween alphabet book together last night. I had him read the letters to me. He only missed 3 in the entire alphabet! Much better than a few months ago when I wondered if he was going to have difficulty learning it before he started kindergarten.
-Jacob can now write his name correctly without any help. He can also spell his first and last name and my name "Mom"
-Jacob has now learned the concept of how to add. He can add "one more" to any number if he can see it visually on his fingers.
-M can pick out the letters B and C. It helps to have an older brother working on it with you.
-Jacob woke up with a bad sore throat and cold this morning. When I suggested Uncle Chuck gave it to him he stated, "No. I have my OWN cold."

Friday, October 16, 2009

Still Growing

Jacob woke up again today with growing pains. He stated they started when he was walking around Grandpa's house last night. It doesn't surprise me since he is eating everything in sight again. He ate three hotdogs for dinner last night alone!

I measured Jacob this morning and he has grown another 1/2 inch since the beginning of September. He has now grown 2 inches since June. I am sure that he is going to shoot up again since he is eating so much lately. He was shorter than most of his class last Summer but is now as tall or taller than all but 2 of the kids. His height 2 weeks ago was about the 50th percentile but that was before his last growth spurt.

M is also growing like a week and doing his best to keep up with Jacob. Of course, he is younger and suppose to be growing a little quicker. M is taller than all of the kids in his class and most people think he is 3 rather than 2. He is still about 3 inches shorter than Jacob but weighs more. His growth appears to be slowing though. He hasn't had a huge spurt in about a month and he hasn't been eating as much. He is showing signs of getting ready to get his last two 2-year-old molars in though. It will be wonderful when that is done.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

We are ready...


Jacob, M,and our friend P finished buying Halloween costumes last night. We are going to our first Halloween party of the season in just two weeks. So what do an 8-year-old girl, a 4-year-old boy and a 2-year-old boy want to be for Halloween?

Jacob- A fire fighter
M- A police officer
P- A movie star in a very beautiful silver dress.

All three kids are very excited and eager to wear their costumes. I can't wait to get some pictures. Our biggest dilemma of the holiday? Trick-or-treating at the zoo is the same day as the party at Grandma's church. I guess we will have to see how the weather is and make our decision then. So the party count is 2 Halloween parties and trick-or-treating Halloween night. It should be a great time!

Still Struggling With Death

My kids both have fears of being orphaned. Jacob still remembers waiting for "a new mommy." He went through a phase last year where he regularly told me he never wanted to have to find a new mommy again. It breaks my heart to think of how many children are out there waiting for new mommies.

Last night I was not feeling well. I told Jacob that we were going to bed a little early because I did not feel well. He immediately became quiet and asked if I was going to die. I told him I wouldn't and that I would feel better in the morning. He stated again that he doesn't want to find a new mommy. I reminded him that he would live with Uncle Chuck if anything ever does happen to me. He stated he doesn't want to live with Uncle Chuck. He wants me to be his mommy. I hugged him and let him sleep with me. He laid touching me all night and asked this morning if I felt better. I was touched that he was so worried about me but also sad that a child his age still worries that he could be orphaned again.

M has been expressing similar fears lately but his don't deal with my death. He told me last week, "Mom, I choose you." I asked for what. He stated, "To be my mom." He also went through a few weeks when I went back to school where he would ask if I would come back for him. He would physically relax and begin playing when I assured him I would.

These two boys are just like so many other little boys and girls out there. They just want to know they are loved, cared for and have a forever family. M is still a foster child but I really hope that he won't be for much longer. I heard last night it could be a couple of years before he is "out of the system." For his sake, I hope it goes much quicker than that.

Friday, October 9, 2009


Sorry I have been quiet lately. My internet isn't working at home so it is difficult to update. That and trying to work full-time, go to school full- time and raise two wonderful little boys. The past two weeks have been a blur but here is what I remember of them:

-Jacob had his birthday party last weekend. I have some wonderful pictures to share with you once I have reliable internet again. The party was wonderful! We went to the YMCA where Jacob had seven friends and some wonderful moms join us. Our good friend, Diane, also came along and was a huge help to me. The kids had a great time swimming, eating cake and playing in the inflatable obstacle course in the gym. The kids ranged from 2 to 8 years old. They all had fun with each other and most knew each other before the party. I haven't decided what to do about M's birtday next May but a party at the Y is a definite possiblity.

-Jacob had an appointment with the eye specialist. The eye doctor was the last person to convince that he doesn't have a terrible disease called Sturge Weber syndrome. Thankfully, he doesn't. There are no signs of glaucoma or other problems. No seizures or muscle weakness and no signs of brain lesions. Woo hoo! The doctors and I already pretty much knew this but apparently milder cases can sometimes hide until around age 4. He is now 4 so it has been ruled out. We don't have to see the eye specialist for 2 years. We will continue with laser treatments to the port wine stain but that is to help prevent problems and for cosmetic reasons.

-M is still with us and his case is progressing. It will actually be taking up a lot more of my time and energy in the near future. Of course, I can't discuss it here except to say it is progressing. I love M and can't believe how far he has come in the short time he has been with me. He definitely fits into the family well and feels like he belongs here. Like all children, he needs permanency and hopefully he will have it soon.

-Jacob continues to do well in his preschool program. He is now writing his name, spelling his first and last name and reading most of the alphabet. I am no longer worried about learning disablilities or other things related to his history and malnutirition. He is a surviver and shows it every day. Both of my kids are amazingly resilient.

Tonight we are off to a play farm to celebrate fall. Then Sunday we can go back with our church if the weather is nice. It is suppose to rain and be cold though so I guess we will wait and see what happens.